How to Practice Self Care During Busy Seasons
We’re kicking off the beginning of a pretty busy season. Whether it's traveling, working ahead to make up for time off, hosting family, cooking, or simply maintaining all of our usual commitments, most of us have a lot going on between mid-November and January 1st. It can be a challenge to prioritize self-care with so many obligations. Even when our commitments are positive ones that we look forward to, it can still be hard to remember to take care of ourselves through it all. While the holidays are certainly a busy season, that feeling of constant “on the go” can extend beyond these few months. Maybe you’re caring for a new baby, a sick family member, starting a new job, moving, etc. Big life changes can equal a busy season of life. The tools below can be applied to other situations even beyond the holidays.
1. What can go? By this I mean, is there something that’s taking up your time and energy that isn’t 100% necessary? In terms of holiday planning, do you absolutely need to have the Pinterest perfect Thanksgiving table? Probably not. Your guests are more likely to remember the meal and quality time shared together than the tiny details. Focusing on those little details can cause unnecessary stress and make you lose sight of the bigger picture. If something is creating added stress, take good, hard look at it. Is it really something that you need to be doing? Is there a way to make it easier on yourself? Thinking through the motivations behind tasks and getting rid of the unnecessary can free up extra time and mental space for the more important things.
2. Practice self-compassion. This is really the foundation of self-care. You need to have compassion for yourself to even realize that self-care is necessary. It’s so easy to be hard on ourselves when we feel like we didn’t do a good enough job. The difficult part is learning to treat yourself like you’re worthy of love and respect, regardless of what you accomplish. Self-compassion keeps you grounded to the notion that you’re still worthy, no matter what you do. A book I would highly recommend is Self-Compassion by Dr. Kristen Neff. She's done tons of research on the topic and has some great resources and tips. More on this in a future blog post!
3. Find time for yourself in the margins. When everything feels busy during the day it may seem like there's no room for taking care of yourself, but there probably is! The "margins" are those times during the day when you may be between commitments like when driving to and from work, or eating lunch, or waiting on someone to arrive. It’s any time that is “off” for you. Once you identify those “margin” times, think about what else you could be doing instead. Maybe it’s reading a few pages of a book. Maybe it’s listening to an uplifting podcast or music. Maybe you go for a short walk. Try diffusing some oils and deep breathing for a few minutes. Whatever it is, find something that is truly relaxing and spend time doing it.
4. Let go of food fears. When life is busy, feeling stressed around food is the last thing you need. This takes time and effort but now is a great time to start. It's totally okay to ask for help when you need it. Seeking out counseling IS self care. I'd love to work together if you're ready to take that next step! By working with a dietitian you're giving yourself accountability and building in time to focus on your own needs. Check out the services page or feel free to email me over on the contact page!
5. Deny perfectionism and practice contentment. Especially during the holidays, it can be easy to get caught up in the "bigger, better, more" mentality that the world is selling. How may people do we know out there that are truly content with what they have and how they're doing right now? If we're striving for perfection, nothing will ever be enough. We'll always be trying to achieve the next greatest thing. If we practice being content with what we have and who we are, we'll be able to appreciate those things so much more. This is the same as gratitude. Gratitude breeds contentment. Striving for "perfection" breeds stress, anxiety and fear. Feelings of contentment can have a calming effect during the busy seasons. More calm=less stress=happier, healthier you!
5 Things More Important than Nutrition
We live in a world that values perfection and an unreachable standard of beauty. Unfortunately, it's perpetuated everywhere and I know how easy it can be to get obsessed with food and nutrition when striving for that. It's consuming. But when we take a step back, it's easier to see that there's more to health (and life!) than our diet. Research is showing us how connected our mind and emotions are to the rest of the body. When we make any choice regarding our health, whether that be what we eat, how we move or the information we consume, it has an effect on us and contributes positively or negatively to our overall health. So there is just no way that nutrition, or a "perfect" diet could solve everything.
Below are 5 things more important than nutrition. They might surprise you because on the surface they aren't "health things." If we look a little deeper, I think you'll agree that each can have a major impact on our health and spirit. Each of these things helps cultivate better self care-leading to better health.
Relationships. Whether we tend to be more introverted or extroverted, we all need meaningful relationships. Research done in orphanages have shown that if a baby is fed and has its physical needs taken care of, but not shown love, or held, the infant is far more likely to suffer from emotional and physical problems. We need to be with others, it's a need that we're born with. Seeking perfection through nutrition is isolating. We will end up avoiding social situations and we miss out on forming the relationships that help us thrive.
Gratitude. A lack of gratitude opens the door for negativity, the comparison trap, and never ending striving for perfection. Practicing gratefulness can help us appreciate the simplest things. Savoring ice cream and conversation with a friend, having the ability to take a walk outdoors on a nice day, having a bed to sleep in, on and on it goes. If we started writing down all the things we're grateful for, I think we'd be surprised at how long the list gets!
Forgiveness. This one can be messy and really difficult. Holding on to negative emotions and anger do nothing to the person they're against. The person it really hurts is you. Forgiveness doesn't need to happen over night (and probably won't), just taking baby steps in that direction over time makes a difference. Many times the person we're refusing to forgive is ourselves. We spend so much time beating ourselves up for not being perfect, or getting it wrong. We just need to take a step back and give ourselves a break.
Grace. This goes right along with forgiveness. We need to show ourselves (and others) grace when we get it wrong. Making changes can be hard, especially when we've been doing things a certain way for years and years. Messing up is ok, mistakes are ok. We learn from them and get better. We are never going to be perfect. Even people who are super normal eaters will overeat from time to time and miss fullness or hunger cues. It's more helpful and important to show yourself grace and compassion in that moment than beating yourself down for not getting it right.
Joy. If we ignore the 4 things listed above, it's nearly impossible to find and experience joy. We won't find it when we're obsessing over food in the name of health. We won't find it when we're spending hours at the gym doing exercise because we feel obligated. We can eat and move joyfully, but if we're focused on the wrong things, we'll never find it. So cultivate relationships, be thankful for what you have, forgive others and yourself, show endless amounts grace and then begin to know joy.